thursday night 

quiet too long

I've done a real half ass job at updating this semester, huh. There's always stuff that I think about and think I should post for whatever reason, but I always forget. So maybe you should call me to keep up with me instead. Call.

PUMP UP THE JAM

I don't like to go to my website and not see some sort of picture. So here's Kat and me. She owns the coolest hat ever.

i officially miss summer...

Three weeks into the semester, I'm finally admitting to missing my summer. The first couple of weeks back have been fun and games, really. It's awesome getting to catch up with everyone, and I'm having a really great time while I'm out and about. I'm so excited about this year because I'm sure it'll be the best year yet, but a few things have made me miss my summer.

First, and most obviously, I'm finally starting to have work and meetings every day. Even though work took about 10 hours out of my day, five days a week, I could come home and do absolutely nothing if I wanted to. I guess it's unrealistic for me to want a completely carefree semester, but I know that I might have bitten off more than I can (or more accurately, want to) chew with an honors thesis and the FE ahead. I guess wait til October rolls around and see what my attitude is.

Secondly, I graduate in less than eight months. Eight months.

Also, I was talking to a friend from work the other day, and something he said triggered my nostalgia for summer. I can't remember what it was he said, but I know I miss lunches at the Thai House, the morning talk show, Lotus Notes instant messenger, Thursday nights, BP at the SP, the GPWs, the EDI office, the pranks in manufacturing, all that jazz. I miss how easy-going it always was when we hung out. I miss being hundreds of miles away from everything complicated.

Which leads me to my final reason for missing summer. Things are complicated, and I'm kind of confused. I don't really understand why people still talk about some of the things they do and what triggers their curiosity. I just think it's awkward that so-and-so talks to so-and-so who talks to so-and-so and so forth until it gets back to me from someone completely unexpected. It's actually funny what boring factual information was relayed back to me. Who cares? Looking back at my sophomore year pictures or thinking about all the great memories leaves me with mixed feelings, too. We'll never be able to have great parties like in Lightsey in the same context again which is really sad in my opinion. Certain people might receive "grief" from their friends for spending time with me or other individuals which is not the way it's supposed to be. The thing is, I know there have been efforts to keep some people apart, but in the end, people are going to do what they want to do. No matter what you say from an external perspective, you still don't know what's at the heart of any friendship. So there is absolutely no reason to force "sides". Be friendly with whoever has never offended you personally, and don't dig for more dirt and he-said-she-said to add fuel to the fire. Let things lie. All this stuff is what I missed being detached from over the summer.

Anyhow, there's so much to look forward to. Still, life moves way too fast!

awkwardstruggle

To entertain myself, I went to my old website just to read some of the stuff I wrote starting in January 2003. Besides a lot of rambling, there are a couple of entries that I thought were interesting, kind of, so I think I'm going to repost most of the website, leaving out some of the really private entries. It's kind of interesting to read through, considering all that has happened in the past two and a half years.
Here she is

i'm loud

ludo: are you in the library?
me: yes, are you in the library?
ludo: yes, I heard your laugh and I was like "freakin amy."